Since that controversial response, and it is inevitable backlash, Ballinger has been absent from her YouTube channel. On Saturday, although, that each one modified as Ballinger uploaded a brand new video with a extra heartfelt and introspective response.

She opened by admitting that the final video she’d posted — her 10-minute apology track — was “embarrassing, to say the least.” That authentic video continues to be on her web page.

She defined her five-month absence from the platform she’d normally posted on nearly every day by saying she “wanted time to ensure I used to be listening and studying as a lot as doable.”

“I additionally wanted to get the assistance that I wanted to be okay,” she added, specifying that she’s spent “the bulk” of those final a number of months in remedy.

After taking the time away from her profession, the preliminary allegations, and her poorly-received response, Ballinger has a brand new perspective on all of it, beginning with why she responded in such an sudden method.

“I used to be being accused of some fairly terrible issues, and I used to be simply mad and I ought to have dealt with that state of affairs with maturity and empathy,” she mentioned. “However as a substitute, I simply let my ego take over, and I am actually dissatisfied in myself.”

Ballinger acknowledged that she’s been each “immature” and “inappropriate” in her comedy over time, and that maybe that very same method got here into a few of her interactions together with her followers.

“There have been instances when I didn’t put sufficient thought into a few of my fan interactions and due to that habits folks bought harm. I’m so sorry,” mentioned Ballinger. “I by no means needed to harm anyone but it surely’s clear that I did, and I really feel like there’s in all probability people who find themselves dissatisfied or really feel deserted by me due to my silence over the previous few months.”

At this level, Ballinger mentioned she is aware of she will’t change the previous and might’t “have management over the issues folks say about me.” All she has is herself and what she does shifting ahead from right here.

“So I’ll do every thing that I can to be sure that I create a optimistic, type, inclusive, protected house on-line with my content material,” she continued. “If you wish to be part of my journey on-line I’d like to have you ever. And if not I fully perceive.”

She mentioned that her aim with this video wasn’t to attempt to win again any followers who might have left, however slightly to correctly apologize and to point out that “it is doable for somebody to develop and be taught and be higher after making errors many, a few years in the past.”

She then shifted to extra conventional video fare, providing her followers updates on her life and household.

After the unique video posted, one in all Ballinger’s accusers mentioned in his personal YouTube video, per Yahoo!, “I’m so comfortable for you, Colleen, that you simply get to make a foolish little track out of all of this and no repercussions.”

Following the discharge of her track, the rest of Ballinger’s then-current tour was canceled.